Schedules, Flexibility, and Balance

I have gotten to yoga once in 2011, but am getting e-mails from my yoga teacher.  She wants us to pick a wword forthe year and really focus on it.  I searched all January for a word.  I used searching as a word as an excuse not to go to yoga. It came to me this week: balance.  Right now, my life has no balance, although in reality I have always struggled with balance.  I tend to approach things full force, leaving little time for balance.  It is an on-going struggle and ties in to the rest of the post  below.

Schedules are important in our house.  I have always liked schedules.  I scheduled our honeymoon and many of our European trips (yes, I know everyone thinks that is funny but it is practical!).  Dave like felxibility so my schedules always usually included large blocks of open ended time for Dave.  After Liam was born, schedules went out the window.  Liam wanted to eat and sleep at will and I wanted peace in the household.  I was still in the midst of  this with Ben when Liam was diagnosed and Dave deployed and suddenly schedules became important again.

For a kid on the autism spectrum, schedules are vital.  Liam has alot of anxiety and it is partly managed by knowing what to expect.  All kids are like this, but Liam, like others on the spectrum, does not have the extra emotional resources to manage his reactions to things being thrown off schedule.  Liam has been in a tailspin since Christmas break and has not been able to snap out of it.  I am watching him backslide and feel helpless as meltdowns and tantrums sneak back into our lives.  In addition, his ABA tutor had a baby last week.  He has a new tutor but with winter viruses swirling around and the change in tutors, he has had alot of cancelled therapy.

Liam attends special education preschool 5 days a week for 2 hours each day.  His travel time on the bus is 30 minutes a day; I spend about 10-20 minutes a day waiting for the bus as it's timing depends on road conditions.  This means his school day takes up nearly 3 hours, but I only have just over 2 hours to b out of the house before I need to be back home to meet Liam's bus.  Liam does ABA 3 hours a day, 4 days a week.  He does speech and OT once a week but that is a 45 minute drive away so it takes a 3 hour block of time.  This means 30 hours a week are scheduled for Liam's therapy.  Ben does Early Intervention 1 hour a week.  He has visiting the chiropractor twice a week, and again that invbolves a 45 minute drive each way so it is a 2.5 hour commitment.  In between those nearly 35 hours a week is our free time to hopefully nap, schedule playdates, see friends, run errands, cook meals, and maybe even have free time to play.

So, when I am asked to be flexible, it can be hard.  Or when the house cleaner scheduled to come at 10am, but arriving sometime after 11:20am finds herself waiting outside in 16 degree weather, because I only had from 11:20pm to 12pm to run to the store to pick up some dinner for tonight.

This post started about balance.....clearly, we are in desparate need.