Backsliding has turned into a free fall

In the autism community, one of the most dreaded words is regression.  I won't call what we have here a regression, as Liam hasn't lost any skills, but behaviorally he seems to be spinning out of control these days.


It seemed to start in January with not wanting to go to school.  By February, he had a new ABA tutor due to his previous one having a baby.  He and his new tutor got into a dynamic of fighting for control, which led to Liam demonstrating his first ever aggressive behavior of kicking and throwing things.  That tutor left for medical reasons in March. This month was a bit chaotic.  Dave was gone for 11 days and Liam's new tutor started.  Dave came home, but was immediately put on a schedule of working 6pm until 6am.  He'd get home around 7:30am and would go right to sleep.  He was still working this schedule when my family arrived.  Liam loved having Yia Yia and Pappou here, but it did disrupt his normal schedule, and his sleep as he was sleeping on the boys' futon in Ben's room.  Last week Liam's new tutor quit to go home to care for a dying family member.

This week I got a note from Liam's special ed preschool teacher as she wants to address some problem behaviors.  They were all things we are seeing at home, but it worried me.  I have talked to the school about Liam's sensory seeking behaviors that are disruptive at home and his teacher has said that he doesn't engage in any disruptive behaviors at school.  So, if different problem behaviors were now bleeding over into school, then Liam is spiraling into problem behaviors in every area of his life.  In addition, school ends in mid-May and there are no preschool options for him here, so he'll be home with me until nearly September.  Did I mention that Dave is going out of town again right when this transition happens?

One of the teachers concerns is about stuttering.  About a month ago, I noticed that Liam has started stutter.  He has just caught up in speech, and now he is stuttering?  It really doesn't seem fair.  In any case, I hoped it was just a phase and ignored it.  Liam sees lots of professionals every week and no one seemed to notice it so I thought maybe he was just experiencing some anxiety at home.  Well, Liam is now stuttering at school.  For some reason, his special ed teacher asked me how I am handling it.  I pushed back and asked her to speak with his speech therapist at school and get suggestions as I am no expert in speech-language pathology.  In the meantime, I talked with Liam's private speech therapist.  She got a chance to observe it and said he tends to stutter on "k" sounds like on the word "can."  She said it is a common sound to stutter on and she doesn't think it is related to stress.  Her suggestion is to say the word with him to help him get it out.

Another of the teacher's concerns is that Liam is exhibiting aggressive behavior related to pottying.   He first did it this weekend while Dave had him pottying.  He threw a bowl of fresh pee across the bathroom, splattering pee everywhere.  Since then, he has fought and will kick and hit various items in the bathroom while urinating or while refusing to use the potty.  He is doing the same thing at school. In addition, he had 4 accidents in 3 days....4 accidents in 6 hours of school.  If he attended a traditional preschool, he would be expelled for having 3 accidents in a month, so 4 in less than a week is not acceptable, especially if I want him attending a community preschool next year.  Add to that the aggressive behavior and Liam's pottying process has become disruptive.  The teacher again asked how I was handling it.  It usually results in a time out and once when he behaved this way mid-lunch (actually he hadn't had a single bite yet), I took his food away.  Aggression for any reason is not something I will tolerate.  There has got to be a better way to manage it then what I have done so far, so again, I asked her opinion.  In the short term, I am thinking of just putting him back in pull ups as he is having at least 5 accidents a day anyway, in addition to the aggressive behavior when he does potty.

The teachers final concern was about Liam's session placement next year.  Currently, he is in the AM preschool class.  His classmates are awesome; Liam is the only one on the spectrum and he gets lots of exposure to appropriate social behavior. However, most of his class is leaving at the end of the year, and we don't know what next year's class will be like.  I asked for Liam to be moved to the PM session next year.  The main reason for this is so he can attend a community preschool.  I found a wonderful parent co-op program at a church in our small town, and Liam visited the class last week and fit into the program beautifully.  It is Montessori-based learning and has two teachers plus a parent volunteer and the class size is small, comparatively with only 12-14 children.  In any case, Liam's teacher is concerned about Liam being exposed next year to two children in the PM class with behavior problems.  However, if he remains in the AM class, he cannot attend a community preschool with typical peers.....and there is no guarantee that the morning class won't have a new student or two with behavior problems.

While I was writing this blog post, I heard from Liam's teacher who confirmed that Liam attending a community preschool is a very good idea so they'll make the afternoon placement work.  :-)

The other problem behaviors we have seen recently are sensory seeking, and thankfully, these haven't happened at school.  He will scratch himself until he bleeds or pick his nails almost down to the quick.  He has started doing sensory behaviors at the dinner table--mainly clapping his hands in front of others faces (like an inch away) or just sitting there and shaking his head side to side as fast as he can.  He will do this until excused from the table and seems completely fine with eating once a day or even not at all during the day.  He has always engaged in lot of crashing behavior, but he is doing it more, laying on the carpet and pushing himself along it, crashing into furniture, etc.

Have I mentioned that I am feeling burned out?  Of course, today getting on the bus, he spontaneously called out "I love you, Mommy" and I remembered that he is worth all the heartache, but I am feeling raw and tired and just overwhelmed these days.