Anxiety

Tick tock tick tock tick tock......

It has been well over 48 hours since I last heard from Dave, after nearly a week of one line e-mails that basically said "I'm alive but cannot write more.  I'll send you a longer message in a couple hours."  Loner messages never came.  I don't know where he is, but I am tryin to remember that no news must mean his schedule hasn't changed.

You'd think after 7 months of infrequent phone calls and Skyping a number of times that can be counted on 2 hands, I'd be used to lack of communication.  But there were always e-mails, and the lack of hearing anythin has my anxiety going through the roof.

Tick tock tick tock.....

I am freaked out about the reunion.  I am worried about a thousand little thins and getting more upset about the idea of him coming home.

Tick tock.....

The move/PCS were NOT supposed to do this summer and that suddenly came up is getting closer.  We need to rent our house and sell a car.  I am a bit frantic.

Tick tock....

Liam's IEP is coming up and I feel unprepared.  I feel even worse that we'll be movin right after he turns 3.  Of course, this means he is too old for Early Intervention at our new home, but the public school system is closed for the summer, so I am having a hard time reaching anyone.

Tick tock....

There are no Mother's Day Out programs in our new location and the preschools have a strict birthday deadline of September 1st, which means Liam will make the deadline by only 11 days and likely be the youngest, when he already is delayed.  Oh, and he needs to be potty trained.  He cannot even pull down his own pants.

Tick tock tick tock tick tock....

Ben hasn't been sleeping, sometimes getting as little as 4-6 hours between the hours of 7 and 7 and refusingg to nap.  This means I am not sleeping.  I don't know how I am still standing.  I cannot even bein my to-do list and I cannot think clearly.  Today is Day 6 off his Prilosec for reflux and clearly he needs to go back on, but I promised the doctors a 14 day trial off of it.

Tick tock.....
Ben has required constant holdin, and I remember what it was like when he was a newborn.  He is refusing to be put down.  It has been like this for over a month.  Poor Liam is being neglected due to Ben demandin all my attention and all my feelings of guilt from last summer are flooding back.

And we are back to the crushingg anxiety......