A drive from Anchorage to Girdwood down the Seward Highway and a Portage glacier cruise

After Anchorage has a rainy, cold summer, it is fall here....complete with yellow leaves, cool mornings, and sunny clear days.  We took advantage of this glorious weather this weekend, and drove down to Girdwood, about 40 miles from Anchorage.  The drive is on the scenic Seward Highway, and the view rival what I saw on a drive from LA to San Diego to visit Dave's best man, Steve.

Leaving Eagle River, we saw this (what appears like jagged clouds is actually Denali National Park, hundreds of miles away....you only get this view on clear days):

This was the view for most of the drive on the Seward Highway:

We checked out times for the cruise and I snapped this photo:

We went into Girdwood and grabbed lunch at a spot recommended by neighbors...if you go, bring cash as we learned the hard way, they don't take credit cards (and no we didn't have to wash dishes, just make a 5 mile drive to the nearest ATM):

We got on the 1:30pm cruise and crossed our fingers the boys would cooperate.  Ben never did nap, but Liam found a friend and they looked for whales (we were on a lake, by the way).  The lake was 600 feet deep on average and was formed by the glacier's retreat.

First view:

Ben was not amused by the excitement of a glacier, specially as we sat for 20 minutes waiting for it to calve.  Supposedly, it doesn't calve all too often.

Then we started hearing what sounded like gunshots and was falling ice.  We were 3 football fields away, but it was creating some big waves.  Dave and I were talking about this arch and how we wouldn't see it fall,but maybe it would be gone within a week:

And then BOOM.....The crew on the boat was so excited.  They said it was the best calving they'd seen all season, which was extra-special as Sunday was the last day until next season.

The boys actually napped on the drive home, and we stopped in Anchorage to grab pizza and microbrew from The Moose's Tooth....Dave and I had blackened Halibut pizza--yum yum!

We made it

We are in Alaska!  It has been quite a journey, but we are loving the scenery and the weather.

We spent the last 3 weeks in a blur of moving and navigating the IEP system in TWO states.   IEPs need to be written BEFORE a student turns 3 years old. We were due to leave Alabama 6 days after Liam turned 3.  Alabama didn't want to write the IEP since it wouldn't be implemented, but Alaska wanted it written so Liam could get services ASAP. 

Then Alabama school system didn't have computer access (eye roll) and didn't want to hand write it.  In the end,they finished it a couple days before Liam turned 3, and it was hand written.  I thought we had a decent IEP....for what Montgomery could offer.  They assessed Liam as operating at the level of a 23 month old in 2 areas: social-emotional and adaptive skills (need I mention Ben is 17 months, so they are almost like twins with a 11 pound weight difference?) and his language at the level of a 2.5 year old.  For a 34% delay in 2 areas and a 25% delay in a 3rd, they offered 1 hour a week at his private preschool.

I knew Alaska had more services, but when they got his IEP, they offered the same services.  The problem?  Private preschools in Alaska don't take non-potty trained children......and Ben is closer to potty training then Liam.  I freaked out, and it was about 48 hours until we moved.  Eventually, I asked Alaska to re-look at his IEP....they had simply looked at what Alabama offered (assuming it was adequate,which it wasn't) rather than Liam's eligibility scores.  In the end, Liam was offered a special education slot at the local elementary school.

We enrolled him Tuesday, and he started today.  His school meets 5 days a week from 9-11am. There are 5 kids and 2 teachers. The room has an elevated reading cave, a dramatic arts area, a huge slide, sensory areas, and lots of space. The other children are all older than Liam and some only have language delays. It will be a great fit for him I think.

Three years of beating the odds

William (Liam) Francis Xavier Routhier was born at 10:38pm on August 20, 2007 by emergency c-section. He required resuscitation and had APGARs of 1, 7,and 8.

After a rough start, Liam development took off, except for poor sleep and a strong preference for Mommy.  He met all his milestones on time and was even ahead. He had zero red flags for autism at 12 months and 15 months.  At 18 months, he was behind a bit on adaptive skills and his language was average (instead of being ahead)....and had 1 red fla, not answering to his name, but everyone chalked that upto "being a boy" and not wanting to respond.  At 24 months, he was behind on language, adaptive skills, and motor skills, but ahead conitively.  He had several red flas: toe walking, not answering to his name, lack of eye contact, and strange obsessions.  I put this out there because people seem to assume that they know at 4 months or 12 months that their child isn't on the autism spectrum.  That wasn't the case with Liam, and the red flags he had were so subtle that his own pediatrician didn't believe he needed a referral for evaluation.  Just because a child is *behind* on language does not in itself mean anything, and an 18 month old meeting all their milestones could still end up on the spectrum. In retrospect, our only warning signs early on were sensory issues (sleep and preference for Mommy).

Now a look at the last 3 years to illustrate.......

3 months later he was a chubby, bouncing baby boy.....who would only nap if he was held, nursed for 60-90 minutes every 90-120 minutes (meaning I sometimes got a 30-60 minute break between session and sometimes nursed non-stop for 3-4 hours, and cried if anyone but Mommy or Daddy held him

At 6 months, Liam was around 17 pounds, could sit up (and had been sitting for a month), could roll both ways, and was already babbling.  He was now napping without being held, but still needed to be swaddled. He still didn't like anyone but Mommy and Daddy.

At 9 months, Liam's sweet, silly personality was showing itself.  He was still refusing to eat solids at all, despite having 8 teeth. He had finally stopped sleeping without a swaddle, and was napping for longer than 30 minutes for the first time ever, but at night,  he woke every 30-90 minutes all night long and continued that pattern until 12 months.  We used to laugh about how he desperately wanted to figure out the world. He had an intense focus on his toys and would play for hours, as long as he was touching me in some way.  He was already pointing and was commando crawling.

At 1 year, Liam was 31 inches long and 21 pounds.  He was finally tolerating being around other people, but we just thought he was shy and sensitive. In his twelve month, he broke 8 more teeth for a total of 16!  He barely ate any solids,but had one on nursing strike (and I was now pregnant with Ben).  He survived on about 40 ounces of formula daily and a handful of cheerios.  He was finally sleeping through the night and suddenly seemed much easier.  He hated his 1st birthday party and freaked out when we made him touch cake. 

At 18 months, I was overwhelmed. Bit by bit I watched my happy baby be replaced by a toddler that screamed constantly for seemingly no reason. He hated going to the store, he took 45 minutes to warm up at playdates, he freaked out getting dressed, and he became frightened by laughter.  I watched his language go in spurts...he had 4 words at 13 months, and maybe 7-10 at 18 months, but he'd go months without using any words at all  and somewhere around 14 months stopped saying "mama."  Somewhere just after 18months (maybe around 19 or 20) he began walking on his toes.  He was 27 pounds and 33.5 inches:

At 2 years, I was terrified about Liam's development. Physically, he was fine: 32 pounds and 36 inches.  But, we was not yet using two word phrases,not saying "mama" yet and not using language to communicate. He could recognize all 26 letters and count to 13, name zoo animals, and give the sounds common animals make.  But he couldn't tell me why he was screaming in front of the fridge or what he wanted out of it. He had gotten to the point where he wouldn't leave the house. I was feeling defeated and hopeless, and wondering why other people had normal babies.  Early Intervention had agreed he qualified for speech therapy and occupational therapy.  When I mentioned whether he should be evaluated for autism, I expected them to say "No, not Liam!  Not that sweet, sensitive little boy."  But they didn't,and my journey of the real hard work started.  Did I mention that when Liam was 19 months, his baby brother Ben was born and had severe reflux?  I don't miss those days.....

Today at 3 years old, Liam is a different child from a year ago.  He is still 32 pounds, maybe 30 pounds after a good poop, but is now 39 inches tall.  He speaks in sentences for the most part (tonight he told me "I tired, I go night-night.  I yawn" then insert a big fake yawn).  He doesn't understand pronouns, especially he/she.  He still has alot of echolalia and doesn't understand much of what is said.  The meltdowns are gone, though they have been replaced by extreme sensory seeking behavior.  On a good day, he passed for neurotypical; on a bad day, people often just think he is a spoiled brat.  On a really bad day, I remember why he got the diagnosis of PDD-NOS at 26 months.

Liam has come a long way.

Happy 3rd Birthday to my sweet, surprising, sensitive little boy who made me a Mommy.

a little bit normal

Liam's birthday is August 20th, and with the big move to Alaska, I decided it would be wise to have his party early.  As luck would have it, that was good thinking, as we see The Wiggles next weekend, and our household goods get shipped the next week.  He loves Pump It Up, a bouncy place that fulfills his sensory seeking needs, so his party was there.  This was the first "real" kid's party we have had, and somehow turning 3 seems like a big milestone.  Liam is a preschooler once he turns 3, and that just sounds older. 

I was worried about the party. I planned a party for his 2nd birthday, but ended up cancelling it due to Dave being about to leave for deployment training and due to the severe sensory defensiveness Liam showed last summer.  Liam just learned how to answer that he is 2 years old; how would he ever understand turning three.

Today showed me that when you are just a little bit autistic (as technically his PDD-NOS means he does not have enough symptoms for a full autism dianosis), you are also a lot bit normal.  Liam understood when he had a birthday, he'd be 3, though his special birthday shirt also helped. 

I look at this photo and I know that motor planning is less delayed now.  He couldn't do this 2 months ago.

His cake and theme were his new obsession: THOMAS!

Before cake, we needed a group photo....but where's Ben?

Oh, that's right, as normal, he is throwing a screaming fit.....he never even napped after the party.

Then the feeding frenzy started and someone got a picture of me!

The Thomas hats were a big hit!

even the sweaty birthday boy stopped to eat

Ben insisted on eating like a dog

Liam's whole face lit up when they brought his cake and everyone started singing.....this was HUGE....a year ago, he screamed during any singing of the birthday song.

Liam and Will, his best friend from preschool, sharing the throne while they ate cake

Liam LOVED the first present he got, which was a Thomas track with water tower

He started to meltdown as he didn't want any other presents, but that one, but we came to a compromise where he held it while opening all the other presents

Finally, little brother, Ben, with his trademark Elvis snarl being held by our awesome babysitter, Clara

My baby has a baby

and he calls her "ba-ble!"

I cannot even express how adorable I think this is.

And before anyone thinks they are clever and says it, NO, this does not mean we need to have another baby!  ;-)

A comparison from a year ago

to show just how far both boys have come and how much they have grown. 

Ben at not yet 4 months on July 31, 2009....He was about 13 pounds, and spent about 6 hours a day crying.  He rarely smiled and his laughs were even more rare.  He seldom tolerated being put down.  Here he is modeling a 0-3 month Alabama onsie:

Ben at not yet 16 months on August 1, 2010....he is about 21.5 pounds, having gained about 8.5 pounds in 12 months.  This is impressive considering for quite awhile he gained only 1/2 pound a month.  He has gained alot in the last 5 months or so.  He still spits up quite a bit--twice  in the last 3 days.  However, he also is very personable and talkative, and loves to smile and giggle.  Here he is modeling an Alabama onsie in 12-18 months.

Liam is 23 months here (July 31, 2009) and is playing with Thomas trains--the only ones he has are the ones shown. Notice how he doesn't have the motor skills to push the trains on the track.  He can say choo-choo, but jargons all other expressions.  He needs to make physical contact with me twice during the 30 second clip.  Notice also his chubby dimpled arms and how much he still looks like a baby:



Liam is 35 months here (August 2, 2010) and is playing with Thomas trains--see how he has two seperate train lines running at the same time?  Notice how he can now answer quuestions and is finally comfortable playing independently with only verbal affirmation?  I love when he says "island of sodor" and I love even more when I hear it spontaneously.  His eye contact is amazing as we talk.

Baby Bunching--toddler style

Last summer I wrote alot about what it is like to have "2 under 2" or baby bunched kids.  The first 5 months were incredibly rough, but things got a bit easier after Liam turned 2 when I had to turn in my "2 under 2" status and just use the baby bunching status. 

About 2 months ago, Liam and Ben suddenly became great friends and I was beginning to re-think my stance on baby bunching (for the record, my stance is DON'T DO IT if you value your sanity and marriage...and it hasn't changed).  This friendship made for some great photo opportunities.

Unfortunately, things change quickly in a household with two babies, and we are no longer feeling brotherly love here. Ben is really a toddler now--not just walking, but running, jumping, dancing, talking, and yelling "mine" ALL.THE.TIME.  Neither Liam nor I are pleased with the replacement of our sweet, flirty baby Ben with a fiesty, opinionated, grabby toddler. Liam is expressing his discontent with pushing baby Ben.  He goes to time out approximately 5 times a day for pushing, and most of those are after a 3 count pushing offense (he gets 3 pushes before a time out, unless the push is particularly malicious).  But there are pushes I don't see, and times Liam simply head butts Ben or slyly pushes him. There are times he pushes Ben when Ben giggles and grabs Liam'shair, so I feel it is unreasonable to punish Liam.  If I did put Liam in time out for all pushing, I am not sure he'd ever leave it.

Ben has started stealing Liam's favorite toys (his Thomas trains, his cars, his Tomas magnets, his favorite stuffed animals) and yelling "MINE!"  Sometimes Ben just hold his hands over Liam's things and giggles when Liam cries.  Ben has started pulling Liam's hair, kicking him, or slapping his face.

I had about a month where I allowed them to ride side by side in grocery store race car shopping carts, but I am back to wearing Ben for everyone's safety and sanity.

Everyone said that the first 2 years of baby bunching are the hardest, somaybe it will be better in another year? Or maybe at least one of them will be potty trained, so I am not chaning 5 poopy diapers a day.  That idea seems like heaven right now.